Health, mental illness

My Personal Battle with Anxiety

anxietyI know I’ve missed a few posts, and I’ll tell you why. I went to a wedding for some friends in Arkansas at the first of the month. When we came back, I ran out of the pill and didn’t call to refill in time. Once I stopped taking it, I realized how important it was in keeping my sanity in check. My mood changed, I was spotting, and developing panic attacks and anxiety-induced migraines. I knew it was anxiety induced because it happened out of nowhere, several days in a row. Last Saturday, I had a migraine that began as a headache right behind my right ear. I knew it was a migraine because nothing made it go away, like a regular headache. I ended up going to bed earlier than usual because I was in so much pain.

I’ve been trying to figure WHY this happened, aside from just not taking the meds. It wasn’t deliberate by ANY means. I understood the anxiety side, but why the panic triggers?

-Situation-The only things about the wedding that were different(for me)was it was in Arkansas and everyone had accents. It was also a lesbian wedding, so when everyone arrived, it was very obvious nearly EVERYONE; save for myself, my sister and her friend, and one or two straight couples, was a lesbian couple.

-Could that have been a trigger? No. I knew one of the brides, she’s a good friend of mine. Used to work with her. The ceremony was at a public park with a cop. A cop isn’t something one has at a wedding. Given it’s the South, and I don’t know how tolerant they are about lesbian weddings, but the people who drove by either paid no mind or honked. Nobody was mean, which was good.

-Situation-A cop. Unusual at a wedding, but whatever.

-Could the cop have been a trigger? No, but it certainly was concerning. I spoke to my mom about it, and she said it was a public area, and maybe they’re required to keep the peace, regardless of the event. Everyone’s seen what’s been going on with harassment at parks. Preventative action? Possibly.

-I didn’t know anyone-I was out of state with my sister, her friend and the only person I knew was one of the brides. Everyone had an accent.

-Could attendance have been a trigger? No. My mom’s family is in the South and it was like being at a family reunion for her side. About the same level of familiarity, except you know the names of a few people.

So what it comes down to, is the medication. As every woman knows, the pill is designed to aide in the menstrual cycle, for whatever situation. Some take it to keep from getting pregnant. Some take it because their cycles are too heavy. I take it because of PCOS. Turns out, it also aides with depression and anxiety. Don’t know if I knew that already.

What it comes down to, is when it ISN’T taken, it messes with your emotions.

So this blurb is to make up, and explain why, I’ve been MIA. It isn’t due to lack of material. It’s due to lack of necessary functional medication in my system.

Something I’ve noticed with this. When there’s a blog written by someone who does suffer from mental illness, it shows. Regular blogs are written in a timely manner. But when you’re dealing with mental issues, EVERYTHING ELSE takes a backseat until your life is better. That’s the case here. If you have an anxiety-induced migraine, you’re sunk. They don’t go away until the anxiety has been eliminated.

So, this is really all I have to say for now. Things will, hopefully, be back to normal by next week.

smiley heart-Ellie V

 

 

 

Beauty, Fashion, Plus-size

Sponsored by RoseGal.com

(*this and other great blogs can be read at the sister site, Miss.Fashionista.com*) We all have to get dressed. These clothes are either GIVEN to us, or we PURCHASE them. How many of you have been humiliated, either intentionally or unintentionally, fat-shamed or just made to feel inadequate due to an uncomfortable size that society deems ‘unhealthy’. Well fret no more! The world has some savvy companies who have come up with a way around this. Personalized, customized, boxed clothing JUST FOR YOU! Now, you may be thinking this is too good to be true. Boxed clothing, for starters, doesn’t give the best image. You probably imagine garage sale style stuff all thrown into a box, and usually smelling pretty bad. Not in this case!http://miss.fashionista1982.com/rosegal . RoseGal is the perfect place for the beautiful plus-size gals out there who dread the fitting room. I worked the fitting room at a well-known retail store. A woman came in to try on a top. She came out and asked point blank, ‘Do I look fat?’ My first thought was total crickets. Never before had I been ASKED if someone was FAT. I honestly loathe that word unless it’s being used to describe food. I told her ‘it looks a little snug. You may want to go up a size.’ She breathed a sign of relief and went back to change. I thought ‘oh my god. Some rude person told this lovely young woman that she was FAT!’ I don’t get it, I really don’t. If one of your anxieties and panic attacks are caused by(possible)fitting room humiliation, I recommend http://miss.fashionista1982.com/rosegal . Not only can you purchase outstanding quality, beautiful clothing for a reasonable price, you can ALSO get home decor. This site caters to men as well. Packaging may be in a decorative box or colorful pouch.
addiction, celebrity

Demi Lovato and the Addiction Monster

demi

As most of the world already knows, Demi almost died of a drug overdose on July 24th. But what’s interesting about the entire thing, is that unlike Britney back in the early 2000s, she didn’t shave her head and go back on tour. She’s being very adult about it, stating it isn’t something that is going to go away. It has to be dealt with one day at a time.

For someone who makes their living in the limelight and is at the mercy of agents and the world, that’s pretty powerful and takes guts.

Looking back in history, countless musicians and actors DIED because they had an addiction that was either already there or made worse by fame. Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, River Phoenix. And those are just on the top of my head. Normally, stuff like this really bothers me, because it seems like only celebrities are given treatment and attention that EVERYONE in her situation deserves. But this time, it feels different. It feels as though she’s mature enough to look back and say ‘hey, something isn’t right and I need to fix it,’ instead of blatantly ignoring and going on her merry way. We all know that can kill you.

Not only that, but if you’ve seen Facebook recently, there’s a new, or continuing debate regarding addiction. Is it a choice? Is your brain already wired to go ahead with it? I don’t suffer from addiction, but I HAVE witnessed people who DO. I used to work with a man who suffered from addiction. Pill popper, alcohol and depression. Had MANY DUIs to the point his license was almost revoked. Missed a day of work because he was in jail due to a DUI. Said ‘wine is like kool-aide’. He KNEW he had a problem, yet his depression kept him from seeking help. His mother told him if he didn’t get help, he’d be thrown out. Instead of going to AA, he’d go to bookstores.

This is how the scene looks to me: an almost middle-aged man living with his parents because he can’t get his stuff together to be productive.

This is how he sees it: I don’t give a fuck.

I knew that was how he saw it because he told me on a regular basis. He got fired from his overnight job because he came in drunk.

This is my take on addiction. Since this is just how I see it, and I don’t suffer from it but it DOES run in my family, it may not bear ANY resemblance to how it actually works. I don’t really expect it to.

If you’re the offspring of full-blown addicts, your brain may already wired to become addicted to something, then it’s only a matter of time before it happens. Like depression. Mine didn’t pop up until I was a teen. Maybe not. But this is where things get tricky. Is it possible if both your parents are addicts, that you may NOT become one? If it’s in your genetics, then there’s also a possibility. Your PARENTS may not be, but maybe a close relative or grandparent is. Skipping a generation. My cousin had a drinking problem when she was a teen. Her parents were divorced and her dad is an abusive dick. My own sister was so depressed she almost drank herself to death. We all know that mental illness can, and so often does, play a role in addiction. You hit rock bottom, you either bring yourself up or hit the bottle. Not the healthiest thing, but when you’re THAT depressed, you don’t care. Is it a disease? Diseases usually require treatment. Substance abuse usually requires rehab. I’d say yes. But I know little about addiction, so I can’t and won’t give a definitive answer.

I don’t know if my cousin still has the problem. She’s married with a kid and is a substance abuse counselor in Wichita. My sister went through a couple of depression programs and got herself a part-time job.

Now, all of us are related. By blood. My cousin’s mother is my dad’s sister. It IS entirely possible that my cousin’s father has addiction problems. It’s entirely likely that just being AROUND him was enough to cause her alcoholism. I’ve never had issues with addiction. Maybe I just don’t have the gene? I don’t know.

This is a big problem in the medical world. A lot of people with a misunderstanding of addiction are actually TREATING people. This seems like a HUGE recipe for disaster. Kind of like male ob-gyn’s. Are there any female doctors who treat men for prostate cancer? Why do men practice in an area of the body in which they do not possess? I know this stems from a not long ago era where women weren’t allowed to anything besides breathe.

As much of a celebrity as she is, Demi KNOWS she’s a role model for thousands. How many listen because they know where she comes from? Dealing with addiction themselves? They see she’s stopping her life to KEEP IT. That tells ANYONE with addiction that ‘your life IS worth it. Get help!’ Unlike Britney who just shaved her head and went back on tour before she was healed. Damn near killed her if I remember correctly. But that was nearly 18 years ago. Things change, for the better or not. Demi appears to be a new force to be reckoned with, one that we have not seen before. She’s admitting she’s got a problem and taking steps to heal herself. You can’t ‘fix’ something like this, no matter what society would like to believe. Because in their eyes, it’s all in your head and just take some Ibuprofen to get rid of it. Well hell, if it were THAT easy we’d ALL be cured! Just like that cartoon where someone is depressed and another person tells them to ‘think positive’ and their life is suddenly better.

Such is the life of the misinformed. Whether it be intentional or uneducated.

On a different note, I am now a Brand Ambassador for Wear Lively bras, in addition to starting a collaboration with FabFitFun! So at the end of my posts, you will start to see links to these sites.

https://www.wearlively.com/discount/AMB-Miss.Fashionista1982

 

Have a fabulous weekend everyone! I love you all!!!!

smiley heartLove-Ellie

 

 

celebrity, Health

The ‘Faces’ of Mental Health

demi lovato

Before I begin, I want you readers to know I am NOT shaming these young women for their problems. I AM, however, shaming the people who have decided these same young women should get more attention than ‘normal’ people for having the same fucking problems. So I should warn you that there most likely will be cursing because shit like this pisses me off. I’m not one for cursing, but this gets my blood boiling.

So last week, practically RIGHT AFTER I had posted the article about makeup, I found Demi Lovato had been hospitalized for a drug overdose. Depression, addiction, eating disorders and bipolar disorder are amongst her issues. All of these can be hereditary. They can also be developed as a result of changed lifestyle. She grew up as an actress on Barney and made her way to what she is right now.

Now, I can see how going from a child actress to the pop star that she is would cause problems. As ‘Tootie’ from ‘Facts of Life’ once said ‘its hard going through puberty in the spotlight.’ Well hon, it’s hard going through puberty WITHOUT the spotlight. The only difference is we aren’t on TV.

 

amy winehouse

Then there’s Amy Winehouse. A young woman in her early twenties. Died of alcohol poisoning in 2011 at age 27. I don’t know much about her, as I wasn’t a big fan. Same with Demi. I don’t really listen to their genre of music and she’s ten years younger than I am.

Both of these women have/had the same problems. At least as far as I know, since Amy’s bio only gives her music history and the events leading up to her death. Demi is still alive and in the hospital.

This is where shit pisses me off. Who the FUCK decided celebrity mental issues, the same that EVERYONE ELSE in the world has, were more important? Who decided that entertainers deserve to go to rehab and get cleaned up, when most of the population is in the same boat and lack proper medical supplies? Remember when Britney Spears had her meltdown and shaved her head? She was hospitalized. It’s almost as if someone is saying ‘these celebrities give hope to ALL people who have the same problems. THEY should be given top priority with health!’ Uh…NO. EVERYONE with health issues should be given top priority. But we live in a world where celebrity voices overshadow their fans. Which is bullshit. FANS are the ones who GET CELEBS FAMOUS! Celebs and Hollywood should be kissing the ass of the little guy, not the other way around. Did you know in Caesar’s time, being an actor/actress was the lowest of the low? Where and when did that change?

But people who sing aren’t alone in this category. Actors/Actresses. Sports figures. Nobody cares about anything until a CELEBRITY becomes a figurehead. It seems to me, the only time something serious is taken seriously by the necessary people, is when a celebrity becomes involved. I guarantee once Demi’s situation is dealt with, mental illness will be ‘widely known’. Bullshit. It’s ALREADY ‘widely known!’ YOU AREN’T PAYING ATTENTION!!!!!

To be fair, I know these women didn’t ask for this. As stated before, Demi’s problems are most likely hereditary, exacerbated by pressures from becoming a celebrity. Amy certainly didn’t ask to die. It seems to me in this situation, it’s like poking a bear. Keep poking it, and eventually it’s gonna turn and bite you. Same with Demi. If the problems aren’t addressed, an OD happens and everyone wonders why. We seem to have an issue in America where we ignore the smaller health problems until it becomes a GIANT problem and we wonder why things got so bad. I’m well aware that not all problems are like this. Heart issues run in my family. Almost everyone on my dad’s parents side, died of heart failure. My grandpa was born with a defective heart valve. My aunt was apparently born with the same problem. Early in his life, my grandpa was diagnosed with some other issue that could turn into a potentially life-threatening illness. Well, he never developed the life-threatening issue from the other problem, but he DID die of a heart attack. He was supposed to get the valve fixed, but opted out. He was in his late 80s. My aunt, on the other hand, is in her mid-50s and got the surgery. I’m well aware of the difference between an 80 year old and a 50 year old. But the point remains the same. If you KNOW about it and don’t, can’t, won’t get it fixed then shit’s gonna hit the fan. Don’t poke the bear til it turns and bites only for you to call foul.

So SHOULD celebrities get more attention for their problems? No. The fans should get more attention because WE are the ones who PUT them there! Somehow, WE are kissing THEIR asses instead of the other way around. EVERYONE needs to be treated in accordance to the severity of their issues. I have ASD and GAD. Do I need to be treated in the same manner as someone with Bipolar disorder? No. Just because you’re a public figure does NOT mean you deserve better treatment!

Ugh. So fucking frustrating.

On a happier note, since I’ve been looking at social media a lot more lately, along with my own life ordeals, I’ve come to the conclusion that I may be able to put out TWO blogs a week. Monday and Friday, Wednesday and Friday. Not sure yet. The world has become so messed up that ideas are just flowing.

Have a great weekend and I’ll see you all in the next post!

Love, Ellie V 😉

Beauty

Women Love Makeup! (Or maybe just a few of us like a little of it)

makeup

As women, ‘society’ demands we wear makeup, whether we want to or not. Whether we’re stay-at-home moms or employed. I don’t know about you, but my mom didn’t work outside the house until my youngest sister started school. I was in 6th grade when she started preschool and my mom became a teacher at her school. It was actually a church my mom had grown up in, and all four of us were baptized in, so she wasn’t a stranger to this building and its patrons by ANY means. She didn’t wear makeup unless we were going to church. I remember her standing in front of the lit-up makeup mirror, putting on mascara and using the eyelash curler. I was in my early teens at this point. Then….she just stopped wearing it, or at least wearing as much. I HAD makeup, but I didn’t actually start to wear it until my early twenties. I was a tomboy stuck in a blossoming female. The girls I went to school with wore it. I guess I didn’t because I didn’t want the attention. I wasn’t liked much by my peers, and knowing my luck they’d have made fun of my attempts. Because EVERY girl between 8th and 12th grade is a professional makeup artist RIGHT off the bat.

(Unless your mother or someone in your family is a makeup professional, then all bets are off)

When you look at makeup, what do you see? Colors of the rainbow. Jars. Tubes. Sprays. Pencils. Crayons. Just LOOKING at a makeup display can make your head spin. Your makeup choices can either make you look magnificent…..or so traumatizing you never do it again. Or somewhere in the middle.

Teen years are clearly where the experimentation begins. My first makeup pieces were leftover lipsticks and blushers from my mom. I wasn’t allowed to use mascara or liner. I want to say that no girl who hasn’t started her period should be allowed to use anything that deals with the eyes. But I also know that girls have different experiences with this, so it’s always up to the parents. I was told not to because of eye infections. Then later in life, I developed eye issues that left infections in the damn dust.

I will never tell ANYONE what they should or should not do. I only give advice and comments. You were born with a brain. USE IT.

Does anyone remember the ‘metrosexual’ phase of the early 2000s? It was the idea that men were allowed to ‘look’ like they take care of themselves. Pre coming-out-of-the-closet, I call it. Where straight men could get manicures and pedicures. I actually had a conversation with a salon stylist about this. Her husband was a metrosexual. Thinking back, how many ‘metrosexuals’ were using this as a backdrop for coming out or prepping themselves for the transgender movement that was slowing gaining speed? Like the show ‘Will&Grace’ showing the world that being gay isn’t a bad thing. Not long after that, ‘Queer Eye’ came out. Makes you wonder.

Anyway, women have always been led to believe that makeup is the only way men will find you attractive. And at some point in time, this may have been true. In case you didn’t know, marriage wasn’t about love. It was about survival. You married, had children, grandchildren. The race survived. I remember reading about a girl in her teens who was married to a much older man. She didn’t love him. She was told she would learn to. I know this goes for a lot of cultures overseas, but this was actually a story. That’s all I remember.

It’s entirely possible that modern makeup was a means of attraction. Like a peacock with it’s plumage. I’m not a historian, so this is pure speculation but it DOES make sense. So assuming that’s the case, it worked up until women decided to wear it for THEMSELVES(what a concept)I’m gonna take a stab and say this was the 1960s when the boring typical colors were outshined by the bright yellows and oranges of the 1960s. Then you had neon of the 80s and 90s. Now….there’s really no limit to color. As for nail polish, I really can’t comment. Up until recently, my nails never grew. Now that I’m on a multivitamin, I have long nails for the first time EVER.

Nowadays, you have two ways of getting your makeup. In-store and online. Not only that, but different ways of purchase. As in the beauty box.

I’m sure you’ve heard of Birchbox. FabFitFun, Target Box, etc. They’re boxes with sample packages of makeup and skincare. Stuff that you may never get otherwise due to lack of availability or never thought about. And not skimpy stuff, either. We’re talking high-end. I won’t say what brands, so you’ll have to look that up for yourself. It also gives you a chance to see what they send. It’s a monthly box and you get your choice of makeup, skincare, nails, etc. It varies by box as well. I get Birchbox monthly and FabFitFun every season. FabFitFun is pricey, but SO worth it. If you DO like what you get, I believe you get the option of buying the full-size. With all the options you get, chances are you’ll never get retail brand again. Five or six items for around $20? Birchbox comes in a small, shoebox-size box. FabFitFun comes in a giant box perfect for a cat. But FFF sends more than makeup. It sends little trinkets. In my last box, I got a small porcelain earring dish from PierOne. You get to choose a few times for your box, but a majority for the monthly is a surprise. Unless you get a specific box, like one that’s JUST nails or JUST makeup or JUST fragrances. Take a look at them! You’ll be happy you did!

In this generation, makeup is still hit-or-miss. But with the growing population of transgender, I expect to see more men wearing it. Though with the older generation of ‘have-tos’ are either slowly shedding that concept and going bare-faced, or they’re sticking with what’s comfy. And that’s fine. Now, it’s all about comfort. If you don’t want to, don’t. But if you have the feeling you want to wear SOMETHING….I’d go with a natural tinted lip gloss. You STILL have color, but just enough to let YOU know it’s there.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Love, Ellie

Uncategorized

Conformity Vs. The Individual

question mark

Conform-Comply with rules, standards, laws

Individual- Single, separate

Those two words are small, yet so powerful. Why? Because as women, we are pretty much forced to conform to what society has had laid out for us since time began. I’m not going to get into the whole history of women’s place in society, and it’s one hell of a ride especially if you’ve been paying attention to the MeToo Movement. It’s roots are undeniably in religion and the smear campaign against Mary Magdalene. It doesn’t get any better from there on out.

Women were property from day one. Ever wonder why ‘traditional wedding’ includes ‘honor and obey’ and taking the husband’s last name as your own? Because women were OWNED by their fathers, then husbands. In some countries, they still are.

Remember ‘Leave it to Beaver?’ The 1950s sitcom about the ‘ideal suburban family’ with two kids, stay and home mom and breadwinner father? This was after WW2 when America was rebuilding. This reinforced gender roles and told women ‘THIS is how you’re supposed to be. Forget about what YOU want, SUBMIT TO YOUR HUSBAND.’ Since women has nothing and no one else to rely on or turn to…..they complied. I don’t think they had much of a choice. Hell, even vintage ads from that era are INCREDIBLY sexist.

Then the 1960s came along. Hippie love and breaking free. No wonder society condemned them. They were a threat to the norms of society. Not long after, the bra burning of the 1970s and civil rights movement. I read somewhere that in the 1970s or thereabouts, divorce was high. No wonder. If you’re forced to marry due to a child out of wedlock(which I’m certain is why my own grandparents married)or you were a war bride, and once the walls of society began to crumble into what it is now, you got the hell out of there.

Then the 1990s. Things began to change. More women entered the workforce. Mental illness began to show it’s ugly face. Back in the 1950s, mental illness and anything outside of ‘normal’ was taboo. Mentally handicapped children and adults were placed in state-sponsored hospitals or ‘lunatic asylums’. Nobody knew how to take care of them in a proper manner. Electroshock therapy. Ice baths. Designed to ‘shock’ the body into normalcy, I suppose. There are two great sources of media that should be entertained with this. The first one is the documentary ‘CROPSY’; is about a man who was charged with multiple counts of kidnapping and murdering handicapped children. It begins in a dilapidated mental hospital in Staten Island. It’s 1970’s footage shows how HORRIBLE the mentally handicapped were treated, and the government’s feelings toward the individuals. The other is ‘Glore Psychiatric Museum’ in St. Joseph, Missouri that goes into the history of mental illness and how it was treated. It’s disturbing, yet educational. We’ve come a long way….to some degree.

Then the attack on the single mother began. Remember ‘Murphy Brown’ with Candice Bergen? Remember when she had her son Avery and he didn’t have a father? Remember how Dan Quayle shamed A TV CHARACTER for having a child out of wedlock? Then there was ‘Frasier’ where Roz had her daughter out of wedlock. To me, this was along the same lines as ‘Will and Grace’. Slowly inserting other ideas for society in subtle ways. Nothing TOO dramatic, just enough for progressives to realize ‘hey, lets do this’.

To me, this is where conformity vs the individual starts to heat up.

CONFORMITY tells women ‘you MUST be married to have a child. THAT’S the rule.’

THE INDIVIDUAL tells women ‘if you want a child out of wedlock, go for it. But things WILL be more difficult.’

Well, history isn’t anything to scoff at. Being married doesn’t always make child rearing easier, especially if the woman gets ZERO help from her husband. The only difference is a guaranteed roof over their heads. Because remember, at this point, divorce was unheard of. Not even domestic battery was enough to warrant divorce. No WONDER these marriages dissolved in the later generations.

So it’s 2018. Divorce is more common than before, and marriage has been put on hold for most people under the age of 30. Given the last few generations, I can’t say I’m surprised. However, with change, comes the all-knowing question: conform or the individual? While conformity is still very much breathing, the individual is STILL on the rise, just not in broad daylight. You may wonder ‘where is it?’

Television. Up until the 2000s, TV and radio were the only means of media. The PC was still in it’s infancy. Then YouTube, Hulu, Netflix, etc popped up. I remember as a kid, before cable, you had four channels. If you didn’t like what was on, you watched it anyway or turned the TV off. I turned it off. Then we got cable. Several thousand more channels….nothing to watch. Again, two choices. I believe this is where conformity begins, to some degree. As a child in the 1950s, you watched Howdy Doody or the Lone Ranger. You watched because it was ON. Programming the brain. As you grew, you wanted to fit in. Continuing to watch because EVERYONE ELSE did. You did it because you felt you HAD to. Conformity. Then other sources of information began to rise. This is where conformity is challenged. You want to watch mainstream TV because it’s on, but there’s nothing to watch. Or you could watch Hulu, YouTube, Netflix because you can see that missed episode of a show you used to watch as a teen. On a side note, when YouTube came out, how many of you searched through it, trying to find the episode you missed of that one show?

Conformity-You’ll watch what we tell you because you must comply with the rules.

The Individual-I see YouTube, Netflix, Hulu. I’ll watch old reruns of ‘St. Elsewhere.’

Sexuality has always been taboo. Mainly because the powers that be fear it. Fear that education leads to better choices. Well duh. We’d rather teach NOT to do it, rather than SAFELY. With the rise of transgender, a lot of women are becoming men and men are becoming women. When I worked at a restaurant not long ago, I saw two people who were getting ready to leave. One, if I remember correctly, was a gay man. The other…turned out to be a man becoming a woman. This isn’t my first encounter. At Walmart, I had the same encounters. I worked the fitting room, and in this situation, it’s difficult to decide which fitting room to place them. Society says they’re whatever gender they were born, and they see themselves as they gender they was SUPPOSED to be. Still, that doesn’t help.

Conformity-You will act the gender you were born as.

The Individual-I’m a man/woman born in the wrong body. I’ll dress according to how I feel. However, if the individual sees themselves as gender non-specific….well, I really don’t know.

Society has ALWAYS told women what they can and cannot do. It’s been horribly unfair and unhealthy. Whether it be religion, family or marriage, women have ALWAYS been given the short-end of the stick. Why? Again, it roots to religion.

Oh hell, I may as well do it.

Mary Magdalene was supposedly the wife of Jesus. The early Church saw her as a threat, thus the smear campaign of painting her as a whore. In the early days, women were held in high regard in religion. But it was literally the men’s fear of Magdalene that started the campaign of women-hating. Blaming Eve and the apple. It snowballed into what it is now. I’ve read how some church doctrine is used to keep women in abusive marriages and give the husbands REASON to hurt them. There was a pastor who had to resign due to this matter.

Conformity-Women. You go to school, maybe college, meet your husband, marry, have children and be a stay-at-home wife until your children move out. Then you cater to your husband until death.

The Individual-Go to college, get a career, if I marry then cool. Maybe have kids. Dunno. Just see what comes.

Change is hard to accept, even if it’s for the better. Especially if it means cutting your strings to what’s been keeping you down. Women, for the most part, have ALWAYS been shadowed by men. I think it’s because men are afraid of what women are capable of when they’re given the opportunity. And rightfully so. The MeToo movement is the best source of evidence. No longer willing to put up with sexual harassment, they’re speaking up. I read a facebook post not long ago that said ‘if you’re now scared to talk to women, good. It means you have to rethink what you’re going to say and any unwanted actions will be reported’. Not verbatim, but along the lines. Good. This means women are slowly able to speak up and be heard. Whether action takes place or not is a different story.

In the wake of global change, it’s safe to say that our old way of life is just another wave. It’s like the civil rights movement, part 2. People are being called out and punished for their misbehavior. Women are finding our voices to speak up against the wrongdoing we’ve continually suffered. The men are getting punished for what they did. Change is here and we’ll be in a new society when it’s all over.

Conformity-Just shut up and know your place.

The Individual-Fuck you.

-Have a great weekend! Love, Ellie V.